How soon is too soon?

Updated: May 22, 2020

For those of us who are no longer with our child’s father, how soon is too soon for them to meet the new partner?

I mean i don’t think there is really a right or wrong answer to this question! There may be a difference of opinion but hey that is usually with everything!

I feel like whenever a women (I could be wrong butttt) has an issue with their child being around another woman it’s usually because there are still feelings there! Or they are still messing around just no title and that is usually when things get messy! Because seriously if you do not have any open feelings for the dad why would you really care? You should be glad he was taken off your hands! I haven’t really seen too many situations where the dad didn’t want the child around a new man but I’m SURE they are out there! I just can’t speak from experience so i won’t touch on that!

However I do feel like each party should want to make sure their new partner will be around for a while take the time to get to know the person! Spend time with them Shawn it’s not your weekend/week with the children! We all know how to prioritize so that the times do not over lap.  I never had a issue with my daughters father having women around her BUT I did not and still to this day do not approve of the amount of women she has been around. When a child is young it’s not easy to  keep adjusting and adapting to new people especially if they are not the right influence for them! Think about it, if that relationships breaks up, think of the damage it will have on the child. Repeatedly putting the child through that will have a damaging affect on their relationships in the future!

Since I having a daughter I try and make sure whoever I bring into her life will be able to build her up and show her how a women is to be treated by the way he treats me! And for my son the man in his life needs to be someone who can show him how to be a man and also how he should treat a woman! I think parents should always keep this in mind when dating. Rather it be the woman or the mans view! So rushing should never be the option!

I’ve seen it where a parent won’t let the other parent see the kid due to them having a new partner! This goes back to still having feelings or it just plain being BITTER! I can’t even imagine to fix my mouth to say such a thing! In the end all it does is hurt the child! She hates when i call her this but Chantal (Kimaras Ex Stepmom) has been in my child’s life since she was little and i never had an issue with it outside of the fact she never combed her hair lol! Her children are boys so i can totally understand her not knowing anything about girls. Yes her and i have discussed this soooo...Heck i still can’t do hair! But that’s neither here nor there, I genuinely know that she loves and cares about my daughter! From what I see and know I can trust her around her with no fear! To this day even though she’s not with my daughters father any more (Good for her! Praise the heavens lol he’s gone kill me) she  still stays in contact with us and we have a friendship! No we don’t talk daily but the fact she’s still around means and says a lot!! NO matter what the naysayers may say..

Ok back on track.. y’all know I get lost and go into something else but that last statement just prompted my next blog (baby mamma's lol coming soon)

I think a good rule of thumb may be discussing your new partner with your children that way it’s not sprung on them! It will give them a chance to open up and think about the situation before being thrown into meeting! ESPECIALLY when you have boys because they are super over protective! Troy and I dated for like 6 months before he met my daughter and then he met Kayden a little later! Kimara is older and can understand, where as Kayden he had never seen me with a man being that me and his father split (title wise) when i was pregnant!  He is very over protective and I just didn’t know how he would handle it! It took him quite a while to break and get use to the fact this man was going to be around!

I feel like as long as the person is treating the child right there should be no issues! What do you all think? Please comment below your thoughts or stories on this matter below!! Can’t wait to hear...

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